I am not a make up girlie. I very rarely wear it, only on the occasional night out and on family occasions when my Mam is around. When I was a teenager, instead of handing me baby wipes and telling me to take my excessive make up off, my Mam would hand me a lipstick and tell me to get some on! I am the first to admit, I am actually pretty clueless at how to wear it nicely, other than a quick spread of tinted moisturiser, sweep of mascara, brush of eyeshadow and smear of lipstick topped off with gloss.
So after her last Chemo, my Mam started to lose her eyelashes. She still has her eyebrows, which was her biggest fret after her hair - the last thing she wanted was to be a 'painted lady'. But her eyelashes have gone. At my cousin's last birthday party, she was sporting some fantastic falsers, to rival Cheryl Cole, so my Mam decided to have a go herself. But I don't think she got very far.
So here is where the most ridiculous feeling of guilt yet creeps in. Me, a 20something year old girl, is too much of a tomboy to ever have been interested in make up and accessories, yet now I feel bad I don't know enough to help my mam wear false eyelashes! How ridiculous! But thats one of the things that the Big C does to you, turns trifling insignificant molehills into mountains the size of Kilimanjaro!
We skyped a few days ago, and its really not obvious - its not like you walk round looking at people's eyelashes. But it is another thing to tackle, another thing to have to accept and move on from. Wednesday is Mam's last chemo, all being well, and then that's it. No more poison going into her veins, her body should start recovering pretty much straight away, and this time that recovery will not be hampered by more drugs 3 weeks later. Our next step is to tackle the radiotherapy, but we're not really even thinking about that yet. Lets get Wednesday out of the way now. And if anyone knows the best way to put on false eyelashes ...